Braxy likes to sit on the dryer & help throw in laundry. I have to hurry when he helps me though or he gets bored & tries to climb into the washer. See the tip of his little blond head? I also have an order the clothes have to hang in. To the extreme left are clothes that air dry or need to be ironed. Then Lexi's clothes, then Braxtons, then Ambers, then Brandons, then mine then Mikes & then any jackets or sweaters. If anybody violates this order (mom!!) I must immediately put everything back into harmony/it's proper order & ask/interrogate the family to see who could have committed such a heinous crime. I have no other real anal tendencies other than laundry related issues. I have other biggie. I have decided that my 11 year old son can only have white hangers. I cannot stand to hang his clothes on anything other than white hangers. Brandon is very orderly & does not do well with chaos so at some point I decided he needed all white hangers in his closet. I will run around changing out other people's shirts for colored hangers before I will hang his stuff if I have to. I am kooky. The laundry is the only thing I have control over so that is why I am anal about it I think. You know, like an anorexic with food, it's the only thing they can control so they do. I'm like.... this is what I choose to be a control freak over? Okay, so at least our clothes are clean & orderly. Laundry MUST NEVER leave the laundry room to be hung or folded. It leaves ready for drawers or closets. A must. Kooky kooky.
I have had a great few days. I have napped like the world was coming to an end. I napped again yesterday!! Who am I?
I am at work today & I have not had a single customer walk in here today & it's 2:47. I did have an Internet order waiting for me from Miami though. Thank you Miami lady. She bought 2 of those large picture frames I am always showing. So I'm not crying in my spilt milk but even with that order I will have done less than half of what I did on this date last year. I am down about 20% over last December. Where is everybody? I am thankful to Miami lady though & to God for blessing me with that sale. In a couple of days the party store moves out. In a couple of months the other store next to me. I just found out that in March the Subway in my center is closing up too. When the party store & the other store closes up next to me over half of the shopping center will be empty. When the subway closes in March.... One whole leg of the U shaped center will be completely empty. How can I survive in an empty shopping center? Only God can save me now. The store is great, it's the center & the economy that's killing me. God has been wonderful to me so far, I just have to know that He is walking this with me & He will take me down the road I must go. I am praying for His strength & His grace to carry me. I just can't be scared anymore, it's too hard. For some kooky reason while I thought it would be harder to just trust in the Lord it has been easier. I just say, it's up to God & start my day. I started in the word today before I left as it has been harder for me to do it in the store anymore. I have been so inspired by Ocean Mommy over at http://notesfromthesoul.blogspot.com/ to spend more time in the word at home alone where I can reflect more on what I am reading. I want so many things to improve about myself & also our life circumstances but I know that I cannot do any of that without staying in the Word. It is always so hard to make the time, why is that? The word of God is my living water, why is it that when my physical body thirsts I go and get a drink but when my soul thirsts I have a hard time finding a moment to open the book & drink? It frustrates me. I want to be a good daughter to my King, I don't want Him to forget me, why would I forget Him? I am frustrated with my inability to do the things that I want. Either time constraints because I am here at the store until late or I have to get Braxy from daycare & then start dinner & baths & homework help & quality time with children. Workout too? Ugh. I have no time!! Take a shower and blow dry? When!! In my ideal life I have no outside of the home job. I wake up from a great sleep, get the kids up & have my coffee. Spend time reflecting in God's word, be able to afford really good Bible studies that I hear other ladies on blogs talk about & learn. Pray for as long as I want. Volunteer at my Church for whatever God leads me to do. And most importantly, I really really want to be a useful vessel that God can use. I want Him to look down on me and say that I have been a good daughter. I am right where he wants me to be. I want to help lead people to God, I want I want. I don't know what His plan is for me but I do know that if I don't make more time for myself in His word, I can't make it to that next step. I am ready to move forward. There is a song on a CD I have from Jentzen Franklin's choir called I'm Not Going Back. As I look upon this year I can't go back. I'm moving ahead, the past is over. (That's also all from the song.) My choir sang that song before I changed Churches. It was a great song and it is so powerful. I don't want to die and say "God, I really did want to live for you but I just couldn't find the time." You know, I have done lots and sang & helped out in the Church office. I'm not a slacker or anything but I keep thinking what have I done to win souls? I am a scardy cat to approach people or just bring it up out of the blue. I have been feeling more and more that I need to be out there doing relational soul winning. What have I done to lessen the amount of souls going down to the pit? Will I be able to look down from Heaven one day & see a soul that I knew but didn't bring up their salvation for fear of upsetting them? How will I feel then? Hell is forever, anger is momentary. I know God doesn't need me to do as he needs on here. But he does use us & I want him to use me. I must stay in His word more & keep Him in my mind more. I must be quiet in my soul so I can hear him when He calls.
Every year I do a resolution. This year my resolution was to kiss my husband more. I feel like I have accomplished that. Not as much as I would like but, I can say proudly that I kiss my husband more. This year it will be a spiritual resolution. I guess I will post it here on Wed or Thurs. Maybe Fri. I am closed on Thursday & I blog from work. Anybody else do a resolution?