Thursday, September 3, 2009

Where Can I Find My Security?

Wednesday morning I sat down for Bible Study feeling slightly guilty that I had not done my morning study lately. I'm still a little off in this new house. So I prayed first and at the end of my prayer I prayed mostly about hearing & seeing God today and I asked for a word from Him if He had one for me.

It gives me goosebumps as I think about just how personal God is.

Some of the best revelations/messages from God I've ever been given is to just close my eyes and strum my thumb across the outside of my Bible knowing that if He has a word usually he will catch my thumb at a certain page. Talk about anticipation! Where will he take me today if He has a word for me. (Sometimes my finger does not get caught up at a page and after a few minutes I will do my own study.) Today there was a huge gap, not just a catch in a page at Romans 8 whose theme is Life thru the Spirit.

I admit, I was a little confused by this as I did a study on Romans 7 & 8 earlier in the year and did a big post on it. I was struggling with why I could not shake off something and put on a new behavior that I wanted and sure nuf God brought me here with my thumb catching in the page when I had prayed about how to conquer that. Of course when I couldn't understand still how to defeat it completely I prayed, strummed again and I promise, no lie, my thumb was caught up at Galations 5. You know, Galations 5:22 the fruits of the spirit. No coinkidinky I think. Well, anyhoo all my questions were answered and I had the road map to conquer that stinky thing I wanted to get rid of. I thought I had learned all I had to learn from Romans 7 & 8.

So I was a wee bit confused but I read it anyway. God's word is so alive. It truly does penetrate us. And isn't it funny that when we read passages, we sometimes see nothing and just blow right past the passage and then another time it is just pure water for our soul?

During my month long blog break I had been asking God some questions. One of them was about the whole money thing. Most of y'all have heard me wonder why so many blessings have come into our lives and how wonderful everything is and has been transformed and the horror of the after effects of the lay off have ended. What a storm that was!!! Sheesh. Everything had been healed and my husband, who would have believed it, has a heart for God like I swear I almost would have never believed could have happened. Except the money. Why I wondered has everything been made better but that? It wasn't that I wanted money, well, you know what I mean. I wasn't looking for more income, I was trying to understand why. If He hadn't healed that I was trying to gain understanding if we had greed issues which I was fairly confident we did not as we are active givers which I won't get into here. I just figure if you are in something it is for a reason so it's best to just learn from it before you have to keep going through it over and over before you finally "get it". Well, God revealed to me during this blog break that it wasn't money I had an issue with. It was security. Security was my idol. I was just little Miss. Secure. And my security was not in God, it was in very good and steady income.

Hello Mr. Conviction, how are you today? Nice of you to drop by.

After that bomb was dropped on me I tell ya, I honestly could not process it. I didn't know what to do with it. I can say that God did impress on me though that through all that valley walkin that I had learned from where my help comes. I learned trust. I learned peace ( whew God, did you think I would ever get that down, lol.) I learned worry is a best friend to anxiety and is fruitless. I learned to be secure in the Lord. I was relieved but I still felt like I still had some work to do in this area lest I forget it all. But as I was pondering it all last night I still wasn't sure and I asked God for a word. He gave me several words.

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

What does the Life Application Bible say about this scripture? I felt compelled to read that study portion.

" God works in "all things" - not just isolated incidents - for our good. This does not mean that all that happens to us is good. Evil is prevalent in our fallen world, but God is able to turn every circumstance around for our long-range good. Note that God is not working to make us happy, but to fulfill his purpose. Note also that this promise is not for everybody. It can be claimed only by those who love God and are called according to his purpose. Those who are "called" are those the Holy Spirit convinces and enables to receive Christ. Such people have a new perspective, a new mind-set on life. They trust in God, not life's treasures; they look for their security in heaven, not on earth; they learn to accept, not resent, pain and persecution because God is with them."

I can't even begin to describe how this sang to me! You know this whole description here just basically described the reasoning for the last 2.5 years of my life, that's all. Nothing major, she says with much sarcasm.

And had I read it before, yes. Did I get it then, no. Do I get it now, YES and Amen.

All that yuck, all was for my long-range good. My trust, my faithfulness and my obedience and ability to fulfill my purpose has a lot of roots in the last 2.5 years of yuck. I needed that yuck. Do you have yuck? Ask God to show you what you need to learn from this. Even a yucky marriage can help you learn to walk in love. Whatever your yuck is, if you have any, can be made into the good things that God has you purposed for. I could not be doing now what I am doing if I did not have the privilege of being stripped of everything.

Does that mean that God orchestrated job losses? I don't know but I do know that God could take something meant for harm and say okay, now let's take this horrible thing and I can do something wonderful for my daughter in this. There is no money coming in, I will teach her to trust in me. She doesn't know what to do, I will teach her how to hear me in this & show her how to know my plans for her. She feels like she has lost everything, I will show her everything she needs is in Me.

Security. I loved my security. I'm not even gonna try and argue that one with God 'cause I fully believe He was spot on with that one. But now I know, where my security lies. And for that I am one grateful lady and I am so happy today that He took me to Romans 8.

Never underestimate the power of asking God for a word.


Mary Ellen ~ Carolina Momma said...

Wow, just wow! This really speaks to what I needed to hear today. Thanks for sharing Jenn.


Mary Ellen

jennyhope said...

Girl 2 years ago we lost half of our income. It was terrible. Talk about the false security that money can bring...amen.
Also, be strong and courageous girlfriend re the attacks of the enemy. Do not give way to fear (it does no good...not that you are). God has certainly used the warfare in my life to show me how much HE is in control and how I need to trust Him and keep wielding that sword. I am praying for you!! Thank you for your sweet encouragement!!

Heart2Heart said...

Oh how I could hear my own voice within what you wrote as we stood at that intersection of life last year. Truer words could not have been written better.

Thank you for showing me much wisdom and insight into what you have written but it was never about the money but the security it brings.

Love and Hugs ~ Kat